No More Faking It

Warning, I realize the title of this post is probably misleading.  While I chuckle at the thought of a post about orgasms, or lack thereof, this is not that post.  Sorry to disappoint.  Or, if you're related to me, you're welcome.

After over four and a half years of practicing law, I finally feel like I know what I am doing in my little world of transactional banking law.  Instead of faking confidence on a phone call, I finally have it. Real confidence.  I came to that realization this week, and it's a good feeling.  Although I'm not going to revel in it too long, because history is sure to repeat itself and the ground always shifts when my feet finally feel firmly planted.  But for now it feels good.

My client called and said he was having problems with a deal and could I please call the other party's counsel to discuss the issue.  Sure, I said, I'm happy to do so.  (As attorneys, we are in the service industry and making your clients happy is the name of the game.  Unhappy client = no work = no money.  This is important to remember.).  So he sent me the contact information and I looked up the other lawyer online, as I always do.  I like to see who's going to be on the other end of the phone.  This is usually a mistake.

Male.  Much older.  Partner.  Great.

I geared up for the possible puffed-out-chest thing that some older male lawyers like to pull on a young female and dialed the number.  And the next thing I knew, it was as if I was over my body listening to myself talk calmly and intelligently, convincing this other attorney that my way was the right way.  There was no shred of an insecure, nervous new attorney talking.  That woman doesn't exist in me anymore.  And it feels really good.

Now if only I could keep this composure when talking to my 16 month old son when he's having a meltdown.  That requires true negotiating skills that I'm not sure I've acquired yet.  Let's hope I make some serious strides in that area before the little man turns 2...

New Nigh-Nigh

Lukas has slept with the same blanket in his crib since he was about two months old.  I bring it with us when we're traveling and cover him up in it when it's chilly.  But he has never shown any sort of attachment to it.  Until this week. 

After our usual night time routine, I rocked him for a few minutes and then put him to bed in his crib as usual.  He laid down but then immediately sat up.  I braced myself for the clearly inevitable begging/screaming to pick him back up.  But no.  He didn't even acknowledge that I was still standing there.  He crawled over to the blanket, balled it up and then laid on top of it and fell fast asleep.

Well that's a new one.

The next night, same thing.  I lay him down practically asleep and he sits up, finds the blanket and then curls up with the blank squished under him.  It's now happened every night this week.

So last night I decided to get this new night-night thing on video.  And since I'm brilliant, I left the light on my phone which threw him off a bit.  Crying/whimpering is not typically part of this sit-crawl-find blanket-sleep routine.  But you get the gist.

Also, please disregard my creepy voice.  And yes, I call him bubba.  I can't help it.  It just comes out.

Up's Day

Today is a very special man's birthday. Today is Up's birthday.  (And if you're a new reader, I should explain that UP is my dad.  He now goes by Up because both of his grandsons call him Up.  Lukas also raises his hands in the air (i.e. UP) when we talk about him.  It's cute.)

Many years ago he told me that your age goes in reverse when you hit 50.  It's always been our little joke.  By this method of calculating age, daddy and I turn the same age this year - 31!

For his birthday, here are some of my favorite memories/factoids of my daddy (in totally random order):

1. When I was little and had a loose tooth, he would tie one end of the dental floss around the tooth and the other end around a door knob and then slam the door.  I loved it.

2.  He was my first date to a dance - the daddy daughter dance when I was in first grade.  It was western themed.

3.  He tried to teach me to parallel park when I was 15 and we didn't speak to each other on the car ride home.  It did not go well.  

4.  He bought me a Barbie once I could juggle the soccer ball 5 times.

5.  He may or may not have influenced my decision to go to UGA (where my tuition was free thanks to the Hope Scholarship) by promising me a car.  And I may or may not have lured him to Carmax under the pretense that I wanted a 0% interest Mitsubishi only to fall in love with a used BMW when we got there.

6.  When I graduated from high school he said he was proud of me since he hadn't actually graduated from high school himself and this made me laugh and smile.  (He has a GED and an MBA!)

7.  We share a mutual love of the movies Groundhog Day, Dirty Dancing and What about Bob.  My mom does not share this feeling.

8.  The morning of my wedding, we had breakfast together - just the two of us.

9.  He has given me an angel figurine every year for years.

10. His other name, aside from daddy and Up, is Narf Erasec.

11. We sing a pretty mean version of Palisades Park.

12.  He has always been my biggest supporter in everything I've done.

 

Happy Birthday daddy.  I love you!  

CURE - For Marco

When I was pregnant with Lukas I was lucky to make a new girlfriend, Emily.  We met through our mutual friend Tedra and our first outing together was to the Dragon Con parade (our husbands are all self-professed dorks) and then we had brunch in Inman Park.  Emily and I were both first time mommies-to-be and were pregnant with little boys due within a month of each other.  We got to know each other during the last few months of our pregnancies and Emily's son Marco was born exactly 3 weeks after Lukas.  The boys had play dates together and we often went out to eat or shopping at consignment sales.  I was thrilled when we found out that Marco and Lukas would be in the same "class" at Primrose.  Marco was one of the original "boys club" members in Infant 4.  He had a beautiful smile and was such a sweet baby. 

The rest of Marco's story is hard to write.  Marco was diagnosed with brain cancer at the end of August and passed away shortly thereafter.  His time here was far too brief and his parents have gone through every parent's worst nightmare.

In honor of Marco, Emily and her husband Chris have put together TEAM MARCO to help raise money to Cure Childhood Cancer and participate in the 2012 Lauren's Run and CURE Annual Picnic.  Mr. Cob and I will both be running in the race in honor and in memory of Marco.

Any donation you can give to help find a cure to childhood cancer is greatly appreciated.  You can donate by clicking on this link: http://www.firstgiving.com/fundraiser/ryanswanson/18th-annual-laurens-run

To read more about Marco's story, please read his eulogy below.

"Marco passed away on September 12th in the loving arms of his mom and dad. He was comfortable and peaceful.


It is hard to eulogize a nine-month old. Undoubtedly, many of the adorable things we loved about Marco are just the things that most babies do. He put ridiculous things in his mouth; the phone, furniture, the edge of the carpet. He hated having his nose cleaned. He grabbed at glasses and hair like they were candy. He grinned and giggled when mom and dad came in the room.

We loved Marco even more for those little things that made him Marco. He was constantly twirling his ankles with a serious look on his face, as if he were loosening up for some future workout. He found it funny when he sneezed. It would always make him laugh. He was easily comforted and never inconsolable, and he smiled frequently with his wide-open toothless grin. If you took a toy from him, he would never cry - he would just give you a look that said, "whatever, dude," and go on about his business.

Marco is leaving us after a very short time. He never walked and even his crawling was pretty suspect - we called his crawling attempts "skydiving" because of the way he lifted and shook all four limbs from his tummy, without moving an inch. He never said his first word. De said "Dada" all the time, but he probably never quite knew what it meant. He never got the hang of eating solid food. We'd never taught him anything or disciplined him or any of that. All of that was still in the future.

All we got to do was to hold him, and to care for him, and to love him, and just for a little while. And yet we can say without hesitation that he brought us the best year of our life. We did not understand that you could love like this before we met Marco. Marco made everything shiny. He invested every task, no matter how mundane, with purpose and meaning. And the sorrow we feel cannot overtake the joy that he brought.

Thank you all for your love and support.

Chris and Emily"

Cali Playground

Yesterday my mom downloaded some pictures from our last afternoon in California.  I tried my hardest to get a picture of the two cousins together, but boys are busy, so I didn't get that "perfect" pic.  But these all made me smile anyway!

Question 3

So back to the 30 questions, which I will probably not answer in 30 days, but hey, let's consider it an ongoing project. So Question #3...

Describe your relationship with your parents.

This is an easy one.  I have a great relationship with my parents.  They live only 35 miles away and we see them on average once a week.  My mom and I talk on the phone about once a day.  Sometimes to chat for a while, others to just check in.  She's an amazing mom and has provided me a wonderful example on how to be a good mother.  We know how to push each other's buttons (don't all moms and daughters?!), but I love her with all my heart and am so happy she lives close by.  And as far as my relationship with my dad, I'm a daddy's girl.  Always have been, always will be.  I still call him daddy and hug and kiss him every time I say goodbye.  He always walks me out to my car and watches as I pull down the driveway, waving at me before he goes inside.  It always makes me smile.  My parents are both amazing and I'm lucky to have them.

"TTT" - Claws Begone

Have you noticed that kids' nails grow like weeds?  I feel like I cut Lukas' nails one day and they're long and sharp again the next.  It's like he has ten little claws at the end of his fingers.

Cutting his nails has been a difficult task for me since he was born.  At first he wore those little hand socks to prevent scratching himself, but eventually I had to cut his nails and it scared me.  I was worried I would cut his nail and we'd have blood everywhere.  So I tried to file them, which was a failure from the get go.  I even may or may not have attempted to bite them off (it's not as strange as it sounds.  Or is it?).  But eventually I realized that the baby nail clippers were the only way to get rid of the baby claws.

But Lukas always resisted.  He hates my manicures and refuses to sit still from me.  Every nail cutting session ended with both of us in tears.  I even tried cutting them in his sleep but he just rolled over on me.  I had a friend who had success with giving her baby a set of baby clippers to hold in one hand while she cut the nails on the other hand.  This didn't work for us.  Nothing seemed to - he just would not sit still and give me his hand.

Then one day he was playing on his little green tractor and I nonchalantly went over and took his hand and clipped the pinkie.  He snatched his hand back and pressed the button on the tractor.  But then he actually gave me his hand back for one more clip, pulled away, pressed the tractor music button and let me take his hand again.  We repeated this 20 more times (it takes me two clips per nail - efficiency has never been my strong suit) until all his nails were trimmed down.  So it may have been a ten minute ordeal, and he would never let me do more than one clip at a time, but eventually, and with no tears, he was claw free.

And it worked the next time I tried.  And the next.

So if you're having issues cutting your little one's nails, maybe this one clip at a time, toy distraction approach will work for you too!

Does your kiddo love getting a manicure by momma?  What are your nail cutting tips?