I know the next few weeks will have some more tears. But I also know there will be smiles mixed in. And laughs as the family comes together to celebrate Papa John's long, wonderful life. And it is definitely a life to be celebrated.
Friday, April 29, 2011
Why the Silence?
It's been 14 days since I last posted. I think the last time I went this long without writing was when I knew I was pregnant but was hiding it from the rest of the world. No, I'm not knocked up again. I just haven't been in a writing mood. My Papa John isn't doing well. So I've been having a lot of family time lately. All my uncles and aunts on my mom's side have been in town on and off over the past week and a half, so on the bright side I've gotten to spend time with them. But then there's obviously the not so bright side looming above us all. It's hard to hug my grandpa goodbye each time I leave him, knowing it might be the last time he gives me a kiss and sweet smile. I'm tearing up now just thinking about it. And I can't help but be consumed with thinking about mortality and what is important in life. And I find myself hugging my family a little stronger than usual and holding on to Mr. Cob's hand a little tighter and rocking Lukas to sleep a little (or a lot) longer than "need be".
Saturday, April 16, 2011
Friday, April 15, 2011
App Happy
I'm obsessed with photography iphone apps. I am. Then again, I'm easily obsessed with things. It's usually a short-lived romance. I'm also easily distracted. So for the moment I'm loving all the things you can do to your photos with different apps. And if I knew how to use them properly I'm sure there are many more cool things I could do.
So here was my original photo:
So here was my original photo:
Now here's the pic after using the "TOONPaint" App:
And then the Picture Effect Magic App:
And Instagram (maybe my favorite photo app):
And since Lukas' hair seems to be growing on the slow side, I thought this MakeOver app was fun:
And finally the Tap Tap Tap Camera+ App:
Which one is your favorite????
2 Parents, 2 Ways
The little man's fruncles are in town visiting. What's a fruncle you ask? A fruncle is an honorary uncle. A close male friend of a child's parents. Friend-Uncle = Fruncle. Get it? I don't know who coined the phrase, either Mr. Cob or one of the fruncles, but regardless, some one said it and it stuck.
Mr. Cob's two best childhood friends are the two fruncles who are visiting right now. Mr. Cob has been looking forward to their visit for months. And now they're here. Today they are home brewing cherry beer while I go to work. They decided to keep the little man at home for the day rather than send him to school. I asked Mr. Cob if he was sure he could handle watching him, brewing beer and doing whatever else guys do. He reassured me that they'd be fine by telling me there were three of them, and one of Lukas, so not to worry.
My first thought was to worry. The fruncles are both single and kid-less. Neither of them have spent too much time around a baby, so I don't know how much help they'll be in the "taking care of baby" part. But Mr. Cob will be home all day. Mr. Cob is Lukas' father. So I shouldn't be concerned at all about Lukas spending the whole day in his daddy's care. But a small part of me is. And I realized its because Mr. Cob has not spent an entire day with Lukas alone yet. I guess I fear he doesn't know what to do with him. But he's a smart man and what he doesn't know, he can figure out.
If I'm really being honest, the problem is that I know they'll be fine, but I'm pretty sure Mr. Cob won't do things with Lukas the way that I would do them. And I need to be OK with that. I need to realize that Mr. Cob is Lukas' daddy and he loves Lukas just as much as I do. He will do what he thinks is best for him. And while his parenting style may be different than mine, that's OK. (And yes, you can have a "parenting style" with a 5 month old. Really, you can.) Lukas won't be harmed or worse off if he naps in his swing rather than in his crib. And his belly will be full whether he eats his cereal at 10am or 11:30am. Or if he doesn't eat cereal at all and just has milk.
I need to relinquish control and give Mr. Cob the opportunity to take care of him. I don't think I do this enough. For instance in the middle of the night if Mr. Cob goes downstairs to try to soothe Lukas back to sleep, I can't help but stare at the monitor and eventually go down there and "help". I'm sure this is frustrating to Mr. Cob. He doesn't even have the chance to succeed. I guess I always think that I'm right and that I know what is best. But in reality, I don't. I'm just guessing most of the time.
But today is different. Today Mr. Cob is on his own. I'm not there even if he does need or want my help. I'm forced to stay away by virtue of distance. I can't step in if I think Mr. Cob isn't doing something "my way". I know they'll be fine, but oh what I wouldn't give to be a fly on the wall!
Mr. Cob's two best childhood friends are the two fruncles who are visiting right now. Mr. Cob has been looking forward to their visit for months. And now they're here. Today they are home brewing cherry beer while I go to work. They decided to keep the little man at home for the day rather than send him to school. I asked Mr. Cob if he was sure he could handle watching him, brewing beer and doing whatever else guys do. He reassured me that they'd be fine by telling me there were three of them, and one of Lukas, so not to worry.
My first thought was to worry. The fruncles are both single and kid-less. Neither of them have spent too much time around a baby, so I don't know how much help they'll be in the "taking care of baby" part. But Mr. Cob will be home all day. Mr. Cob is Lukas' father. So I shouldn't be concerned at all about Lukas spending the whole day in his daddy's care. But a small part of me is. And I realized its because Mr. Cob has not spent an entire day with Lukas alone yet. I guess I fear he doesn't know what to do with him. But he's a smart man and what he doesn't know, he can figure out.
If I'm really being honest, the problem is that I know they'll be fine, but I'm pretty sure Mr. Cob won't do things with Lukas the way that I would do them. And I need to be OK with that. I need to realize that Mr. Cob is Lukas' daddy and he loves Lukas just as much as I do. He will do what he thinks is best for him. And while his parenting style may be different than mine, that's OK. (And yes, you can have a "parenting style" with a 5 month old. Really, you can.) Lukas won't be harmed or worse off if he naps in his swing rather than in his crib. And his belly will be full whether he eats his cereal at 10am or 11:30am. Or if he doesn't eat cereal at all and just has milk.
I need to relinquish control and give Mr. Cob the opportunity to take care of him. I don't think I do this enough. For instance in the middle of the night if Mr. Cob goes downstairs to try to soothe Lukas back to sleep, I can't help but stare at the monitor and eventually go down there and "help". I'm sure this is frustrating to Mr. Cob. He doesn't even have the chance to succeed. I guess I always think that I'm right and that I know what is best. But in reality, I don't. I'm just guessing most of the time.
But today is different. Today Mr. Cob is on his own. I'm not there even if he does need or want my help. I'm forced to stay away by virtue of distance. I can't step in if I think Mr. Cob isn't doing something "my way". I know they'll be fine, but oh what I wouldn't give to be a fly on the wall!
Wednesday, April 13, 2011
Weight Weigh-in
As I've mentioned many times before, I gained a "few" pounds when I was pregnant with Lukas. Maybe with my next pregnancy I'll be a cute pregnant girl, but this time I was just gigantic. I'm 5'4 and tipped the scales at over 200 pounds by the end. Yup, I was huge.
So in an effort to whittle down to my pre-baby body, I decided to join Weight Watchers back in the fall. You can read all about the ins and outs of WW on their website, but this is the gist: You are given a certain amount of points each day, plus a lump of "extra" points for the week and you earn even more points for your activity. All foods are given a point value based on the fat, protein, fiber and carbs in the food. So you can eat whatever you want, with the goal of not using more than you daily points. The extra points and activity points can be split up during the week or used all at once on a splurge meal (or wine drinking extravaganza for those of us who like wine...just keeping it real folks).
As a nursing mother, I'm not supposed to restrict my caloric intake or "diet" or I'll run the risk of having all the milk dry up. This wouldn't be good for my goal of nursing for a full year. Luckily, WW takes nursing into consideration when determining your point allotment for the day. For example, my friend at work on WW gets 29 points plus points a day and I get 43. So I'm not losing weight as fast as someone who is not nursing, but that's OK with me. Also, you are "supposed" to eat all your points each day so as not to deprive yourself, which isn't much of a problem for me.
I started WW in December, but didn't really commit to it until January. The decadent food during the holidays was too enticing to give up (and my mother-in-laws almond cookies - they're amazing and I ate like 15 a day. Yes, 15). On January 2nd I weighed 171.8 pounds (so for those of you counting, I lost over 30 pounds in the first two months after Lukas was born - 8 of those pounds was the baby and then there was the excess water, etc.). And now today, after 3 months of weight watchers, I'm down to 147.4 - that's 24.4 pounds since January. And it's not from working out. (Remember, I'm taking care of a baby and being a lawyer and wife, yada yada...and I'm not one of those wonder women who can do it all. If you are one of those people, I hate you. Just sayin.) WW really does help with portion control and making you aware of what you are eating. I religiously write down EVERYTHING that I eat on the website (I have the iphone app that makes tracking my food really easy). I now think about what I'm eating and consider whether or not its worth it.
I have about 20 more pounds until I reach my goal weight. But I have less than 10 pounds to lose until I hit my pre-baby weight, which is really exciting. I think I can get there in about two months, if not sooner since I committed to a workout routine this week. Lukas is now going down to bed around 8pm every night. So I have at least 2 hours before I turn in that I can work out, or if he has a good night, I can get up in the morning and jog. We have a treadmill, hand weights, a stability ball and lots of workout DVDs. So I have no excuse. And I'm really motivated with the summer coming and the fact that I'm in a friend's wedding in 6 weeks. I also would really like to be able to wear all the clothes in my closet again. I'm already in my old skirts (yay!), but the pants, although they do button, are just too tight. The stuffed sausage look is never in fashion.
So here's to losing the rest of the weight and getting fit. I'll keep you posted on how its going...
Tuesday, April 12, 2011
Lukas' Newest Friend
Lukas and I spent the weekend with this sweet little lady:
Isn't she precious? She's the new baby girl of one of my best gals from law school. I loved getting to meet her and spend some time with her momma. As an added bonus my two other favorite law school ladies were there too. It's amazing what a relaxing weekend with your girlfriends can do for your soul. All the gabbing and relaxing were so exhausting that my little man decided to start sleeping through the night while we were away! Just another plus to a fantastic weekend.
I wish all my girls lived in the same city, but it just ain't so. But this makes our trips together more meaningful. And the next time we'll be together we'll be 3 bridesmaids and one stunning bride...in just about six short weeks!
Sunday, April 10, 2011
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