I'm a "Wean-ee"

Weaning Day 12.

My current thoughts. WARNING, they're not all coherent...

1. Days 1-10 were easy. Aside from the guilt. And the emotions. Physically they were easy.

2. Day 11 I woke up leaking milk (glamorous, eh?) and I felt like my boobs were going to explode. I was in serious pain. The pain lasted all day.

3. Day 12 the hormonal craziness started. Tears. Unexplained sadness. Sobbing. I feel like I'm losing control and I have no idea why. I think it's all related to the weaning.

4. Other "side effects" I have at the moment: fatigue, headache, nausea, leg cramps, itching, tender boobs and dizziness. Like I said, I feel like I'm going crazy.

5. I wish I hadn't stopped nursing. I feel like I made a mistake. I don't know why I feel this way. Lukas hasn't asked for milk/to nurse in days. Now he asks for moo milk (the kind from a cow). He isn't mad at me or showing any signs that he misses nursing. Yet I still feel sad and like I made the wrong decision.

6. Lukas still wants momma to put him to bed at night. We thought having Mr. Cob do bedtime would help Lukas transition away from nursing easier. But we quickly realized that by my stopping nursing AND simultaneously not putting him to bed anymore that he may have felt like I was deserting him. He would wail and cry out for me. After a couple days we realized he just wanted momma. Not my milk. So I took to doing bedtime again and he hasn't cried at all. Lesson learned for weaning future kids.

7. My boobs are quickly shrinking. Boo.

8. My stomach has also been shrinking. I feel like my body is suddenly letting go of all the bloat and the excess fat it was holding on to while I was nursing. A nice positive in a sea of negatives. At least I look thin.

9. I've been starving the past couple of days. No clue if this has anything to do with weaning.

10. I miss it.