"Grab a Baby"

[Warning: This post discusses breastfeeding and contains the words boob and nipple.  You may want to stop reading now.]

This weekend Mr. Cob and I attended a couples breastfeeding class.  Yes, its a real class.  Yes, I could've taken one for just mothers.  No, I didn't exactly ask Mr. Cob whether or not he wanted to go.  I just thought that it would be best if we both learned as much as possible about this thing we know next to nothing about.  And he didn't protest at all, even though the class took up three hours of his Saturday morning. 

As an aside, we have decided to exclusively breastfeed Lukas from the start.  I don't know how long this will last and after this weekend's class, I'm aware that this could be a difficult undertaking and one that is extremely time consuming, at least in the beginning.  Before I got pregnant, my feelings about breastfeeding were very negative.  I had no intentions of nursing my future child and didn't think there was anything wrong with that decision.  I wasn't breastfed and I turned out "OK". (Yes, yes, OK is a relative term).  But once I became pregnant and the reality of having a child and having to make that decision of how to feed him sunk in, I've been convinced that I should at least try to breastfeed.  The benefits are well-documented and who wouldn't want to give their kid the best chance from the get go?  Still, I wouldn't say I'm exactly jazzed about the idea.  But I'm committed and we're doing this.  Although, I will not be one of those women who just sits around and pulls my boob out to feed my kid wherever I am.  While breastfeeding might be a natural thing, I think you have to respect everyone else around you and realize that breastfeeding makes many people uncomfortable.

Ok, so back to the class and my initial reason for writing about it.  Mr. Cob and I were the second couple to arrive.  Upon entering the classroom, our instructor told us to sign in and "grab a baby from the bin."  I glance over at the bin and Mr. Cob takes charge signing us in and grabs the baby on top of the stack.  Now I should back up.  The bin of babies contained both black baby dolls and white baby dolls.  All three babies on the very top were black baby dolls.  In my head I wondered, what baby is Mr. Cob going to grab?  Well he grabbed the baby on top - a black baby doll.  I chuckled to myself a bit because (a) Mr. Cob had a dream a few months back where I birthed a black child and he "did not take it well" and (b) I would've picked the same baby while having this internal back and forth struggle about what to pick, which it turns out Mr. Cob had.  In both of our minds (as we discussed later), something seemed wrong about picking through the pile of dolls to make sure we had one that matched our skin color.  This was a fake baby that we were going to use to practice breastfeeding positions - the color of the skin didn't matter, in my opinion and Mr. Cob and I both somehow thought it would be racist to have insisted on picking a white baby.  But then I got to thinking, did he just pick the black baby to prove we're not racist?  Would it be weird to practice breastfeeding with this fake black baby?  (It wasn't).  Am I totally over thinking this?  But as the other four couples entered the room, an interesting impromptu social experiment unfolded.  The third couple - a white couple - dug through the bin until they found a white baby.  The fourth couple - again a white couple - followed suit and selected a white baby.  The fifth couple - a black couple - opted for a black baby.  And the sixth couple - another white couple - picked a white baby.  So we were the only couple with a fake baby with a different race than ourselves.  And I then wondered, were we the strange ones?  Should we have picked a white baby?  What does it all mean?  Probably nothing, but it was just interesting to observe.

And for those wondering what we could possibly have learned in three hours on breastfeeding, here are the few things that stuck out to me:

• It costs over $1000/year to formula feed a baby
• You have to breastfeed your baby 8 to 12 times per day - seriously.  Doesn't this seem high to anyone else?
• The top three positions for breastfeeding - cradle, cross-cradle and football hold
• A proper latch is key
• They have things called nipple shields if you have "problem nipples"...
• You need an extra 500 calories a day to produce an ample milk supply
• The size of your breasts do not determine how much milk you will make

And since I've already crossed many lines in this post, I might as well continue.  Last night I bought a nursing bra to bring to the hospital.  I figure I should be prepared in case this little guy decides to come early.  Well, for all moms out there you already know the deal with nursing bras, but for everyone else, they are one of the strangest contraptions around.  The idea is that you just unhook part of the bra to expose your boob for feeding without the need to take off the entire bra.  Well, in order to do this, the nursing bras have this huge hole for your boob to poke out of.  It's hard to explain, but trust me, this might be the least sexy thing I have ever tried on in my life.  Not that nursing is sexy.  But still.  This definitely won't help my overall feeling of sexiness post-baby, which I'm sure will already be at an all-time low.

But hey, its all for the baby, right?