Another Wednesday Nears

Tomorrow I head back up to Atlanta to see my Maternal Fetal Specialist. And the nerves are setting in again. I'm hoping for another boring appointment, but am preparing mentally in case it goes a different way. I was talking to a friend last night about everything and she commented that I was so calm and handling everything so well. I told her that I had my moments. And I do. On the whole I'm feeling good about Bridget and this pregnancy, but the fear is still lurking.

I'm almost 32 weeks, so the fact that we're that far along has eased some of my worries. Even if one of my MFM appointments doesn't go well, Bridget is gestationally mature enough to hopefully survived without too many complications. I know a NICU stay would be in her future and that would be hard, but she wouldn't be a micro-premie. Still, I'd like her to stay put for at least another 5 weeks until we're officially full term at 37 weeks.  I also realize that I have no real control over that.

It's also sinking in that in less than 2 months, she WILL be here. We'll be a family of 5 and I'll have a daughter. I'm starting to get sad that Julian won't be my baby anymore. But he's helping me get lots of snuggles in and softening the blow by telling me he's "so happy to see my sister Bridget." And multiple times a day he'll randomly stop whatever he's doing, come over to me and say, "Momma, let me tell you something.... Bridget's my sister." He melts my heart. I just hope he loves her this much once she's actually here and he has to share me with her.

I feel like there's still so much to be done before she arrives. We're putting the finishing touches on the kitchen (well, the husband has been working tirelessly to do that). And her room needs, well, basically everything to be done. I did buy some pink paint this weekend. I went with Angelic from Sherwin Williams. So I need to paint. And then we need to get my white bureau from when I was a little girl from my parent's house for her room, move the crib from Julian's room into the nursey (which will require the husband to put together an IKEA bed for Julian which is a bear of a project) and then decorate her room.  I know there's still time for all this, and it's not the end of the world if we're not finished before her arrival, but I'd like to get it done. I think my hesitation to get moving is still this underlying fear that something could still go wrong with this pregnancy and her arrival. I know I need to be positive, but buying her anything or preparing for her to actually be here is something I've just been unable to do.

Please say a prayer that we have an uneventful appointment tomorrow. Bridget, please be boring my girl.  There is plenty of time for shenanigans in the years to come!