Random Preggo Thoughts

I generally feel icky today so this will probably not be the most uplifting of posts.  But let's roll with it in an attempt to somewhat document this pregnancy #2 for posterity.  So here are a few really random things on my mind today.

1.  If there is a next time and I'm ever knocked up again, someone remind me that maternity clothes are not the devil.  I finally pulled my bin of maternity clothes out of the basement this weekend and I've been much more comfortable ever since.  The fact of the matter is that even if you keep jumping up a size in your pants, regular pants are not built for a baby bump.  Maternity pants are.  Coincidence?  No, dumbass.  I'm happy to report I am very comfortable in my maternity pants today and will not be turning back for oh, you know, another 6 months or so.  So please forgive seeing me in the same 5 outfits.

2.  I must have been waiting for the flood when I was pregnant with Lukas.  Or perhaps I just didn't care.  So far the two pair of maternity pants I've worn (designer jeans that I'd forgotten I'd even bought and black GAP work pants) are both seriously short.  As in, even short for flats short. I must've tried them on with flat sandals or barefoot before because I'm pretty sure I wouldn't have purchased these if my brain had been correctly screwed on.  Will this stop me from wearing them?  No.

3.  2nd trimester is not the honeymoon phase I remember from last time.  I feel "blah" most of the time.  And I'm convinced my face is just looking old and saggy.  Perhaps I'm having a girl and she's stealing my beauty (anyone heard that old wives' tale?).  But seriously, I think I look rather mousy lately.  Mousy is not a good look for me.  I also don't have a ton of energy like you're "supposed" to have in the 2nd tri.  Mind you I don't feel the need to get in bed the minute I get home from work every night either, but I'm certainly not bursting with energy.  And this nausea thing has subsided but randomly pops back up, say when I'm in the middle of eating my lunch and suddenly cannot fathom swallowing the food currently being chewed in my mouth.  Blah I tell you.  Just blah.

4. I'm really getting anxious about this bump growing big and not being able to rock Lukas or hold him in my lap.  He woke up calling for me at 4am last night and just wanted to be cuddled.  I don't know if he had a bad dream or wasn't feeling well or what.  I do know that having my son hug me tight and snuggle up into my neck while he falls back asleep is one of the best feelings in the world.  Last night as we were rocking all I could think about was how much I was going to miss that when this belly becomes an obstacle.

5.  I'm equally as anxious about gaining massive amounts of weight again.  This feeling isn't going away, but neither is the FEED ME NOW hunger that seems to strike all day, every day.  I really need to let it go, I know.