Why I Turned to Clean Eating

The back story:

I grew up in a "healthy" house.  My mother put time and effort in to cooking healthy meals for our family and she was probably ahead of her time on the health front.  I remember eating artichokes as a snack when I was a child and dinner was always a family affair.  Candy and sodas were a treat, not the norm.

I swam competitively until my senior year in high school so I didn't have to worry about my weight for the first 17 years of my life.  I ate anything I wanted and never put on weight (swimming 2-4 hours a day will do this).  I grazed (a word I still hate to this day).  I nibbled and snacked often.  My body needed the fuel to push me through intense workouts. 

Then I went off to college and ate dining hall food, followed by sorority house food and then began cooking for myself at 20.  I worked out in college but don't remember having many body issues. (Then again, I drank a lot of wine, so maybe I just don't remember.  I also smoked cigarettes - a lot - more than I care to admit, but I mention that here to emphasize that "health" was not at the forefront of my mind during this time.) It wasn't until law school that I really recall feeling like I could not lose weight.  I remember telling my girlfriends that no matter what I did I simply could not get under 130 pounds.  So I began running and doing yoga.  But I continued to eat the same - often eating out in downtown Athens, picking up fast food and eating a lot of Chex-mix from the law school's vending machine.  Running helped my mood and mental state during law school, but the weight didn't budge.

I began working as a lawyer in the fall of 2007 and the weight started creeping up.  No longer was 130 the number I couldn't get under.  I was now struggling to get under 140.  (I should note that I'm 5'4.)  My clothes were no longer fitting the same.  I felt less than sexy and found myself constantly worrying about how I looked and felt.  My first step was to hire a personal trainer at my gym, but instead of losing weight he just bulked me up and we didn't even talk about nutrition.  He and I quickly parted ways.

Then I signed up for Boot Camp at my gym.  I also became engaged to my now husband and was trying to lose weight for our upcoming wedding.  So I worked out at least an hour a day and was very conscious of my food intake (from a caloric standpoint, not a health standpoint).  The exercise, strict 1200 calorie diet, stress of planning a wedding and working as a lawyer did cause me to lose weight and I was at my lowest weight in a long time when I got married.  But I stopped working out on our honeymoon and indulged in decadent food and drink.  I didn't return to boot camp when we got home and a 1200 calories/day diet is not sustainable in the long run. The pounds crept back on quickly.   

Six months after our wedding I joined a nutrition program (Venice Nutrition) and met with a nutritionist once a week.  The program was centered on increasing your protein intake.  I was eating more protein bars than you could imagine.  I lost maybe 2 pounds in a couple of weeks.  It was discouraging.  And costly. So we parted ways.

Eventually I just went back to running and training for another half marathon.  Running kept me fit but didn't give me the slim thighs body I was hoping for.  But I was feeling good and was content for the time being.  I was under 140 pounds again and more or less happy with how I looked.

Then in the winter of 2010 I became pregnant.  I was overjoyed.  I could stop worrying about losing weight.  But I wanted to be healthy for the baby so I began reading as many books about prenatal health that I could get my hands on.  I must have about 20 books on being pregnant.  Seriously.  I committed to eating healthy and working out during my pregnancy. 

But I failed to carry out my good intentions.  Most days I was too exhausted after work to exercise, though I did try to walk a few days a week.  I was constantly hungry while pregnant and didn't plan accordingly, so I wound up getting a snack many days from the food court below my office building.  The week before Lukas was born I weighed 202 pounds.  So yes, that means we're talking over 60 pounds gained in less than 9 months.  (I do think part of my weight gain was genetics - my mom gained over 50 pounds with each of her pregnancies and I put on weight each week even if I walked 5 miles every day and only ate very healthy.  But I'll admit that there were many choices I could have made differently that would probably have had an effect on my weight gain.)

I loved being a mom more than anything I'd ever experienced.  But I hated the way I looked and felt after my son was born.  I remember going to Target when he was maybe 3 weeks old because I needed some pants to wear around the house.  I cried in the dressing room when the LARGE black sweat pants were too tight.  Way too tight.  But I had to wear something, so I purchased the Extra Large sweat pants.  And then I signed up for Weight Watchers.

I didn't start seriously following WW until Lukas was about four months old.  And I didn't work out regularly.  But I was nursing and the weight slowly started coming off.  When Lukas was 9 months old, I had lost almost all of the baby weight.  I do think Weight Watchers helped because I was writing down everything I put into my mouth, so it made me aware of what I was eating.  But then I stalled around 142.  No matter what I did, I seemed to hang around this number.  I started working out again.  No change.  I strictly followed weight watchers.  No change.  It seemed that I was bound to stay somewhat flabby and less than enthused about my post-baby body.

But then I started really looking at what I was (and wasn't eating) and the exercise I was getting (or not getting).  Most days I ate only 2-3 fruits and vegetables.  I was consuming a lot of sugar.  We were eating out many meals a week.  And I wasn't working out regularly.  Something finally clicked and I realized that I was in control of my body and what I put into it and what I did with it.  I wasn't destined to feel frumpy.  I was destined to feel however good I chose to feel.  It was on me.  No more excuses.  If I wanted to change, then I had to change what I was doing.  I also made the decision to be HEALTHY.  I was less worried about the number on the scale and more concerned with leading a healthy life for myself and my family.

Running had never given me the body I wanted.  So I realized that signing up for another half marathon might get me in shape, but it wouldn't give me the end result I was looking for.  I needed to switch up my workout routine.  On a whim I decided to try Insanity.  And it has been amazing.  I feel powerful and energetic.

But I think the reason I've managed to lose over 8 pounds in less than 2 months is because of the change in my diet.  I didn't set out with the intention of "clean eating" but as I've gone along these past few months, I've done a lot of research and reading and realized that eating clean is something I can sustain and do without feeling like I am sacrificing anything.  It is not a diet.  It is a way of eating and living. 

I started by making simple changes.  I eliminated sugar from my coffee.  I read EVERY food label and ingredient before I buy a food.  If there is an ingredient I can't pronounce, I don't buy the food.  I buy mostly unprocessed food and shop on the perimeter of the grocery store.  But the perhaps the biggest change is that I PLAN AHEAD.  I go to the grocery store with a list.  On Sunday I plan out what we're eating every night for dinner AND what I will bring to work for lunch every day.  Each morning I spend the extra ten minutes to pack lunch AND snacks for my day at the office so that I am never unprepared at work when hunger strikes.  And I eat breakfast every single day.

In the next post I'll talk more about my strategies for clean eating, but I hope this post gives you some insight into why I finally decided to make a change. 

Have you struggled with losing weight?  What has worked for you?