The Truth

So here's the deal.  I gained over 60 pounds during my pregnancy.  You: Huge Gasp.  Me: I know.  "They" say that you should gain between 25-35 pounds during pregnancy.  Well, when have I ever done what I "should" do?  No, in all seriousness, I'm convinced that your body does what it wants to do.  Now I'm sure if I'd been a psychotic calorie counting fool during the 9 months I was carrying Lukas, I could've kept the weight gain down a bit.  But I ate when I was hungry and allowed myself to eat some things I normally don't eat (ice cream for example, or the occasional chicken biscuit for breakfast).  However, I was by no means eating fast food and junk food for every meal, or even every day or week.  I tried to eat lots of protein and fruits and veggies.  And for at least the first 4 or 5 months, I was still working out regularly and then towards the end I tried to fit in short walks whenever I was up to it.  So this is a long winded way of saying, I didn't just say to hell with it, let's get as fat as possible.  But in the end my body decided I needed to gain all this weight anyway (and by body, I really mean my booty and legs).  And my doctor never said one word about the amount of weight I was gaining (aside to assure me that it was fine when I asked her), so I decided not to worry if she wasn't.

Well fast forward to today.  Lukas was born exactly 4 weeks ago.  As of yesterday, I have lost 28 pounds.  For all you math majors, that means I have at least 32 pounds to go.  Big sigh.  And I can't start working out for at least another two weeks, nor can I "diet" since I'm breastfeeding.  Bigger sigh.  So what's a girl to do?  Well, for one, I'm trying not to worry about it or let it bother me.  I'm honestly amazed at how quickly my stomach has shrunk - I now just have this small pooch...definitely not my old flat stomach, but not a glaring "you just had a baby didn't you? stomach".  I know it took me 9 months to gain the weight, so it's not going to magically disappear overnight.

But here's the problem: clothes.  I have the hardest time getting dressed every day.  My maternity clothes are too big and look ridiculous on me.  But my regular clothes are still way too small.  Even my tee shirts are too tight given the new enlarged set of knockers I have due to breastfeeding. 

The first few weeks I was just wearing sweat pants and nursing tank tops.  But then my mom came over one day and asked if I was ever going to "get dressed" again.  She mentioned that I might feel better if I stopped dressing in sweats every day.  As usual, she was right.  So the next day I wore my maternity jeans and an old button down of Mr. Cob's that's way too small for him.  (Yes, this outfit was a step up from the sweats).  But now the maternity jeans just don't work.  I'm constantly hiking them up and feeling like they're going to drop to my ankles at any minute.  The song "Pants on the Ground" keeps ringing through my head.  Pants on the ground, pants on the ground.  Looking like a fool with your pants on the ground. 

So this weekend I decided to go shopping.  I left Lukas with Mr. Cob and armed him with a bottle of pumped milk and told him to call if they needed me.  And I headed out to Ross.  I swallowed my pride (err, actually my ego) and tried on jeans in sizes I'd never seen before.  And I am now the proud owner of a pair of $15 size 14 Levis.  And as my BFF told me, at least they aren't a size 16.  Gotta love your girlfriends.  So that's where I stand people.  30+ pounds to lose and size 14 Levis.  But at least I now have a pair of jeans that aren't maternity jeans and that make me feel as good as possible in my new figure.  And I can't wait to burn these jeans and move on down to a size 12 baby. 

And on the bright side, my boobs are way bigger than ever before.  So there is a silver lining.  Oh yea, and the baby is super cute, so that helps!